For most of April and into May, I was struggling. Struggling to get out of bed in the morning, struggling to keep my energy up, struggling to connect with what I was doing.
A few things shifted (one of which was using melatonin – 1mg of the liquid form – on nights where I work late; I’m loving it, give it a try if you have monkey mind at night), but mostly everything is the exact same. And yet I feel awesome right now.
The difference? Choosing Joy.
I remembered that in most moments and certainly at least a few times per day, I can choose to feel joy. To revel in what is good, beautiful, or meaningful about this moment and to allow that to completely wash over me.
The early morning sun filtering into my window. My hands on the keyboard reminding me of my mother’s hands. The coziness of my bed where I like to write my newsletters first thing before breakfast.
The world is full of insanely miraculous beautiful joy. But you have to choose to experience it. You see, it rarely just shows up on its own, because there is actually an intense vulnerability to joy. When we are at our happiest, particularly in our culture of scarcity and lack, we often get scared. Is this feeling going to last? Is it safe to be happy? Am I tempting fate?
I’m here to tell you it IS safe to be happy. Yes, bad things will still happen now and then as that’s life. But those bad things will happen regardless of how you feel in between so you might as well choose joy when you can. Whenever you can.
“ENJOY YOUR LIFE,” as my 87 year old neighbor loves to admonish me. In the quiet moments, driving your car, sharing a meal with a loved one, walking your dog, brushing your teeth, choose to experience the wonder of life.